Confessions of a pórn loving woman (and why she’s not alone)

Confession: My name is Feminista Jones and I love watching pórn. Pórn in this instance refers to séxually explicit videos featuring men and women engaging in various types of kínky, séxy activity. I’m not a fan of magazines and still images, but I absolutely love watching people get it on. I’ve opened up about my voyéurism, and definitely admit that I’m highly ároused by being able to get a sneak peek into the séx lives of others. For most people, watching pórn is about indulging in a fantasy or a séxy illusion that árouses one’s senses.  Others just want something fun to watch or seek to satisfy a língering curiosity.

The longstanding stereotype that pórn is just for men is simply untrue. Women absolutely do watch X-ráted movies, and not just the softcóre stuff either. According to a study conducted by Dr. Gomathi Sitharthan at the University of Sydney’s Graduate Program in Sexual Health, at least one in three women watches pórn. She cites Internet accessibility as one of the contributing factors to the increase in viewing in recent years. This is true enough, as anyone can now access hundreds of thousands of videos via snippet sites that allow users to upload video clips and share with others for free. And even despite the ease with which people can now access these videos, CNBC reports that the pórn industry is still estimated to take in over $14 billion a year in revenue.

I became interested in the pórn-viewing habits of women, especially women of color, because I often see women and men talk about it with hesitation. I did a quick survey of my Twitter followers and received 206 responses to six questions about viewing habits and preferences.

What Do Women Like to Watch and Why?

Think most heteroséxual women are checking out X-rated movies primarily to see fit, well-built, séxy men? Think again. Dr. Meredith Chivers found that the gender of the participants in pórn didn’t matter much to the women watching. Women respond to the level of activity before they respond to the gender of the actors doing the activities, she found. This might explain why 53% of the women report enjoying lesbian scenes (at least two women, no men present) as one of their top three genres. I also found that 14.5% of the women enjoy wátching gáy scenes (at least two men, no women present), and 30% of the women enjoy watching group séx scenes (several men and women) or gángbángs (one woman, several men).

The longstanding stereotype that pórn is just for men is simply untrue. Women absolutely do watch X-rated movies, and not just the softcóre stuff either.

Women also report enjoying “ethnic” scenes, or scenes focused heavily on African-Americans and Latino/a-Americans. This category had the biggest response, with 68% of the women indicating it is in their top three favorites. There’s a level of cultural affinity associated with the visual it seems, and if women are focusing on the fantasy aspect of pórn, it might be easier to connect to the actors who are of the same race/ethnicity or women they’re used to seeing in their daily lives.

I also asked the women to choose their top two reasons for watching these movies. The large majority (82%) said they watch pórn to masturbaté, which speaks to the árousing stimulation watching people have séx provides. The survey revealed that 43.2% of women also thought of pórn as something simply fun to watch, while 38.3 % of women said they watch pórn to learn new tricks and techniques. I’d recommend any woman looking for something new and éxciting to try in the bédroom to check out some of those steamy clíps and see what you can reenact the next time.

What About the Stigma?

Many women feel that pórn degrades women, and struggle with reconciling the árousal they experience with the reality of the images depicted. About 32% of the women surveyed say they avoid pórn that degrades women, while 27% say they don’t feel bad watching pórn that features women being degraded because they choose to make the videos. Even more interesting is that 25% of women say they feel bad about the women being degraded but are still ároused, and 21% say they actually get off on the images of women being séxually degraded.

Approximately 13 million women check out at least one pórn site per month, according to Nielsen ratings. “Pórn provides an alternative way for women to satisfy their curiosity, learn more about séxuality, and explore séxual desires and séxual positions in the privacy of their home alone or with a partner,” says TaMara Campbell. According to my own survey, 50% of women prefer to watch pórn alone, most likely because they prefer to masturbaté while doing it.

Of those who do watch with someone else, 74% say they are comfortable with their preferences and don’t mind sharing with a partner. Further analysis shows that the remaining women who don’t

feel comfortable sharing their preferences with a partner tend to prefer scenes featuring BDSM/kínk, gay male séx and taboo situátions (incest, rapé fantasies, etc).

Women are increasingly taking ownership of their séxuality and pleasure. They’re no longer waiting for séx to be done to them; they are making it happen for them in ways that not only get them off but empower them. Like with anything in excess, some women can develop addictive habits around watching pórn, and I caution anyone experiencing this to reach out and get help. There are many resources available for people with séxual addictions, and pórn addiction is a very real issue in relationships.

That said, women shouldn’t feel like they’re alone in their pórn watching or in their preferences. No matter the scene or the kínk, there are other women out there enjoying the view just the same and getting off. Remember to be safe, be aware, and above all feel free to explore the various cinematic fantasies that might éxcite you.